Feelin 32 Lyrics and Video

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It feels like a perfect night to put on our sweatpants

Watch some Netflix, uh uh uh uh

It feels like a perfect night to go to bed early

Fall asleep at seven uh uh uh uh

Yeah

We're paying bills and eating spinach at the same time

It's miserable and miserable oh yeah

Tonight's the night when we forget about receding hairlines, it's time uh oh

I don't know about you but I'm feeling 32

Everything will be alright, if I’m in my comfy shoes

I don't want a bud light, but I’ll take a home-brew

Everything will be alright, if we just keep dancing like we're 32, 32

It’s gonna be one of those nights

For ibuprofen, my joints are achin’ uh uh, uh uh

It’s gonna be one of those nights

You ditch the party scene, and end up sleeping, instead of drinking

Yeah

We can laugh and pull a muscle at the same time

It hurts but it’s hysterical oh yeah

We fall asleep after one glass of red wine, it’s time uh oh

I don't know about you but I'm feeling 32

Everything will be alright if I stay near the bathroom

I shouldn’t have another piece, but I really want to

Everything will be alright if we just keep dancing like we're 32 uh uh ah ah ah 32 uh uh uh

I don't know about you, 32 uh uh 32 uh uh

It feels like one of those nights

We do our taxes

It feels like one of those nights

We don’t know teen slang

It feels like one of those nights

Fries look like bad news but I can't have you, I can’t have you ohh, uh, yeah

I don't know about you but I'm feeling 32

Everything will be alright, I got a deal on shampoo

I’d watch Boy Meets World, but it’s not on Hulu

Everything will be alright if we just keep dancing like we're 32 uh uh, 32 uh uoh,

32 uh uh, yeah, 32 uh uhoo, yeah yeah

It feels like one of those nights uh uh

We ditch the home scene

It feels like one of those nights uh uh

We fly to Iceland

It feels like one of those nights uh uh

Hannah turns 32, she’s turning 32

Welcome to thirty-two

---

Abby Moore Keith

freelance writer

abbyelisemoore.com

a list: Feeling (Thankful) 32

Some years for birthdays I make lists.

A few years ago I made these lists:

a list: 28 by 29

a list: 30 by 30

Both of which proved to be full of fun and adventure. Things to accomplish.

This year I turn 32 In two days to be exact. Doesn't seem like a big milestone year numerically. But seeings how 31 is coming to an end on a much higher upswing than it started, I am hopeful for 32. Perhaps it will go in to the best year ever categories like 24 and 29, we shall see.

I don't have any lists of fun things I must do concocted yet for the year, but I am thinking about making some. I function better when I have plans and goals and things to look forward to.

But for now I will write a list of 32 things I am currently thankful for:

1. JESUS. It's Holy Week. The dark and light of the week always gives me chills. It may look dreary and doubtful, but just wait. Sunday is coming!

2. A job that I love. Perhaps I only get to keep it for a season, perhaps I will retire from here, but for now I am thankful to be in a position that allows me to truly feel my gifting being utilized.

3. Dancing.

4. The past two (partly bittersweet) weekends spent marrying off two of my dearest friends.

5. A home in a proximity to work that allows me to not experience road rage ever.

6. Anticipation of the amazingness that will be the re-write of T Swift's Feeling 22 into Abby Moore Keith's Feeling 32 in honor of my 32nd birthday!

7. The spring and the blooms and the leaves and flowers and the birds chirping.

8. The cutest nieces and nephews.

9. My small group at church.

10. Getting a drop in visit with both Amanda and Lacey this week.

11. A heel that seems to be healing
*taking a break from running right when spring starts to try and heal my heel is not very ideal

12. A new book arriving in the mail today! Good job, mom : )

13. Birthday month goodies arriving each week from a pretty special aunt!

14. The anxious anticipation of things that may or may not ever happen.

15. Knowing things about myself that I didn't 7 years ago.

16. Family. (I need to plan a trip home soon!)

17. My fish Franklin. Still alive 3 years and 3 moves later! He's a champ!

18. My car. So practical and efficient. Is it bad to love my car that much?

19. Opportunities to serve.

20. The time to sit and write this.

21. An upcoming long weekend.

22. The month of April and it's lack of crazy.

23. Trying to buy a house and not buying a house but learning a lot about what level of adulting buying a house really is.

24. The number 24. I just like it a lot.

25. Volunteers and family partners at Habitat that make work a joy and delight to be a part of.

26. A dad who sends cute cards and notes and who has sent them for as long as I can remember.

27. Ice cream.

28. No longer having  a leak in my ceiling. It's been months since we fixed it, but I am certainly still very glad that it is no more.

29. Friends that are like family.

30. Lists.

31. The Gilmore Girls Reunion that is happening on Netflix.

32. Birthdays. Not just mine.

...and that's 32 with many more things I could list. I'm also thankful that stopping at 32 things I am thankful for is harder than thinking up 32 things...


Coming soon....the lyrics to Feeling 32, inspired my life and birthday and written by the one and only Abby Moore Keith!

I Coordinate the Volunteers, I am not a Volunteer...

Most anyone who reads this blog already knows that I started a new job back in November, which my previous post hinted at. Since November I have been working as a Volunteer Coordinator for Habitat for Humanity of Greenville County. Just to be clear, I am not coordinating things voluntarily as some have understood that title (if I could I would, but a girls got to eat and have shelter and dance and all that). I am, however, coordinating the wonderful volunteers who are willing to give their time and talents so that we can provide affordable home-ownership for residents of Greenville County. 

But this journey didn't just start in November. 

And it may have started before I actually remember. 

But the most defining time that I recall my life beginning to lean in this direction was about 9 years ago. 

My senior year of college, I received a flier in my mailbox for AmeriCorps. 

I had never heard of such a thing. Sure mission trips and long term missions where you raise support were always an option, but not something that would pay you (barely) and insure you and give you an education award at the end of your service. With a summer gig at a camp lined up and nothing else post graduation, it seemed like a good idea to me!

So I started applying. As it turns out, I was/am a terrible interviewer, but some AmeriCorps programs are in need just enough that they will take said terrible interview for phone voice value and invite you to move to a city you've never been to before and you know only 1 person.

So that's what I did in January of 2007.

My AmeriCorps experience changed me. It made me into an adult concerned about her community from a sheltered college grad who didn't know a thing about the world. It introduced me to Habitat for Humanity and a love for the build site at my first Build-A-Thon on the Gulf Coast. It is where I really learned that Habitat was my niche and where I knew that going home dirty and tired and sore knowing it meant something was how I wanted my life to be lived. 

The Wake county affiliate grew me in those two terms of service by leaps and bounds. Just ask them : ) I'm sure they'd be happy to tell you about the sheltered and shy and inexperienced girl from OH that showed up in January of 2007.

I took a break from Habitat for a few years in between, and had some other wonderful and also life shaping experiences. But none quite like those first two years out of college. I love the camp life and would go back if I felt the Lord's leading. BUT. My heart truly feels filled and useful when I am working with the volunteers, staff and family partners at Habitat.

So as my previous post talks about calling and jobs and how they don't always end up being the same, right now I get to have one in the same. 

I am so glad to be back at Habitat and building homes, community and hope with some of the best people in the world!

And if you live close by, be sure to check out our volunteer opportunities here : )

This Thing Called Calling

Maybe I've known what it was for a while. But it wasn't available. I couldn't get to it yet. 

I wasn't ready. 

Much of my life has felt like preparation. Preparing me for what? I've never been sure. I have never believed the season I was currently in was going to be long term. Some seasons were certainly longer than others, but none of it seemed to be 'the thing'. 

Recently, I read an article about how to find your calling. (You can read it here.)

This ending paragraph stuck with me:

"Unlike a job that is for a season, a calling will beckon us for a lifetime. It creates an inner drive and restlessness when we live outside of it and peace when we are embracing it and living inside of it. A job is printed on your resume. A calling echoes in your epitaph."

I have lived in that restlessness most of my ever changing vocational life. (Ask anyone who has spent much time with me. I am always looking for the next thing. A little envious of those who have found their 'thing'.)

There have been glimpses of this peace that comes when you do what you are meant to do. Short lived experiences volunteering here or serving over there. Spending a day or a week gaining blisters and being exhausted in service to others. Going on this service learning trip or a brief glimpse into what that thing over there might be like. But I have never gotten to keep it. 

And maybe this side of eternity, I never will. 

But maybe, just maybe, the thing is right around the corner. It is waiting there. Waiting for me to be ready. For us both to be ready. Waiting for when my gifts, talents, abilities, desires all line up in just the right way. Waiting for me to take that next step around the corner to look it in the face. 

The article ends with this:

"Consider your calling and diligently pursue it. It will make all the difference."

So that's what I will do. 

Even if 'the thing' never happens, I will pursue the use of the talents and abilities I have been gifted with in the hope I know to be true. The hope that the One who calls is faithful and when we align with Him, those deep felt longings can be satisfied.  

My mom once said to me, 'you have to go through what you go through in order to get to where you get to.' So I'll keep going through in hopes of getting to.

Because 'the thing', my calling, might be waiting for just the right moment for me to finish going through and to actually get to. 

And maybe, just maybe, it might be right in front of me right now.

(You can read the full article on calling via Relevant Magazine, here.)

Happiness

This isn't my usual blog post. 

Usually I write more light hearted 'a day in the life' no real confrontation or conflict involved. So reader beware. 

This winter has been hard. 

*it's spring now, I know, but I'm still coming off the pain and trials this winter left behind. 

This winter was full of heavy thoughts and actions. Worldview altering decisions. Interactions and happenings that left me feeling disappointed in humanity. 

And what I wish I could say is that I have overcome them. That I'm ready to move on and restore my faith in humanity. But I'm not, nor do I know that it will ever really be restored. 

Don't hear me wrong, there are many people out there loving and serving and being upstanding members of society, but that's not the point of this post. 

These choices that were made in the very close world around me were made in feeble attempts to find happiness in some form. To find some sort of fulfillment in varying ways. Relationally, financially, emotionally, chemically. 

At least that's how I see it. 

And the thought that I'm left with is not a thought of 'I just hope these choices made the choice maker happy.'

Because as it turns out, when we all seek our own happiness, someone else is often left hurting or losing or confused. 

No, friend (or stranger that stole my purse), your happiness is not what I want for you. 

What I want so deeply that I almost don't express it because it's a longing you can't explain all the time, is for you to know Jesus. 

Not for you to be happy. 

Maybe happiness will come with that and we will rejoice if it does. But maybe trials and testing will come with that and we can rejoice in that too. Because

"we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint..." (‭Romans‬ ‭5‬:‭3-5)

No, I don't want you to be happy. Or at least I don't want that to be the only thing. Or the main thing.

My friend, I want you to know who created you, who loves you deeper than a brother, who sacrificed life and rose again for you. I want you to know the one who longs for you. 

I want you to want the joy and suffering and fulfillment that comes in knowing you belong in a place outside of this temporal world. And that your hope can be to someday rejoice in that fully forever. Because 

"now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known." (‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13‬:‭12‬)

No, I don't want happiness. I want Jesus, regardless of my worldly happiness.

An Update: Six Months in the Making

Life. It seems to be getting calmer now. As if a new normal is settling in.

I turn 31 in less than a month and it seems that 30 has been nothing close to any normal that I have had before. I left the job I had known for 3 and half years which included a lifestyle all its own.

In the mean time I had 3 part time jobs.

A very generous and fun family allowed me to live with them for the summer. A friend and I were re-directed from living together and an adorable apartment by the flea fiasco of 2014 (and other circumstances). In October opportunities opened up for both of us separately and I moved in with 2 great gals. I am paying rent for the first time since 2008.

I gave up on running after training half way for a full marathon. When the weather permits, I will run again.

On the same day in October, after a short period of unemployment, I was offered 2 jobs. I accepted one of them and have been there 4 month now.

The holiday season was a different feel this year. I went to Cracker Barrel with friends for Thanksgiving, which apparently many people do. Then spent most of the day alone. I only got to be home for about 72 hours at Christmas (this was my first year without a Christmas break, I am very thankful for all the years before). It seemed to be the year of no return to me. As if what once was would never be the same again. But maybe that's every year.

Wickwarmers did very well over the Christmas season. I could hardly keep up!

Some interesting relationships began to develop and others fizzle all at the same time.

I was a wedding coordinator for a dear friend for a weekend, which I thoroughly enjoyed. Also much enjoyed at that wedding was seeing far away friends all in the same place at the same time. And at 30 years old it was the first wedding to which I brought a guest (ever), and a very helpful sidekick and guest he was.

Five days after the wedding, my car window was busted into and my purse was stolen and I spent much of January and some of February trying to sort that out and get the bank to give me my money back.

The next day in January some life altering (bad) choices were made in my closest circle of friends. The effects (or affects?) of which reach far beyond us and far beyond the days we can plan ahead.

A year of transition was defined the day I got a W2 for a job I forgot I had and thought was going to be my 4th and final, but was my 4th and still waiting on final. Which I received and enjoyed doing my taxes as usual.

January was mostly a blur.

February has gone by in a flash. How are there only 2 days left?!

This week I reorganized my room and moved in my trusty elliptical machine. The machine I give a good deal of credit for my 40 lb weight loss 2 years ago and the machine I hope to get me back down the ever fluctuated 8-15 lbs I have gained back since.

This week I also bought a ticket to meet my mom in San Francisco this summer! And found a good deal. And can run off the energy that planning travel gives me for days!

It seems things are settling in. A new normal. Creating rhythm after a season of chaos in many ways.

But without the chaos we wouldn't appreciate the calm. Nor would I learn and grow and gain perspectives of which I might not have otherwise.

Oh, and I got to sneak in a trip to the beach recently for good measure.

March, the best month, the birthday month is 2 days away and I welcome its arrival. Here's to the chaos that makes us appreciate the calm and the growth that is gained in the mean time!

On Giving Up

I have given up on a few things from time to time.

When I was a kid I was a quitter more than a go-getter. Maybe I still am at times. I quit piano, the most regretted quit. I quit softball, but I don't really regret that. I quit gymnastics, but that wasn't entirely my choice (I can, however, still do a one handed cart wheel and amaze my niece who is learning to do round offs).

A few months ago I gave up chocolate for 40 days. I usually give up something in the Lenten season. This year it was Instagram and other social media. Every couple of months, I take a week off Facebook. Honestly, I would quit that one all together if not for the far away friends and pictures of nieces and nephews it allows me to keep up with. And occasionally I give up things like ice cream and pop just to keep control over my habits.

As an adult I have actually gotten much better at seeing things through. Mom made me stick with volleyball my freshman year of high school and I played 6 years for school teams and the 10 years since recreationally. I finished AmeriCorps and did a second term and anyone who knew me the first 2 months of that knows how badly I wanted to quit. But I didn't. And I am glad that I did not quit those things.

Learning to see things through has also allowed me to know when it's ok to give up and move on from something. Be it a hobby, relationship or goal that just isn't within reason.

My most recent thing I am giving up on (just for now, not forever) is training for a full marathon. In May it seemed like a good idea to sign up for one. It doesn't seem like an entirely bad idea now.

But....

It seems the best thing to do is to give it up for now. When I do my long runs, still no longer than a 1/2 marathon, my knees press on in quiet anger and pain wondering what in the world I am trying to do to them. It also is a huge time commitment that I am not quite equipped to make for the next two months.

I like running. And I want to keep liking running. And running a marathon this fall just seems that it is not the way to keep liking it. I will continue running and building a better base and strength that I need to be able to complete a marathon (someday).

But for now, I am hanging up my goal and going with being better at what I know I can already do.

Sometimes the thing to do is push through and not give up. But others, giving up might just be the best thing to do.